Amazing Spider-Man #159. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from August 1976.)

"Arm-in-Arm-in-Arm-in-Arm-in-Arm With Dr Octopus."

Words by Len Wein.

Pencils by Ross Andru.

Inks by Mike Esposito.

Lettering by Joe Rosen.

Colours by Glynis Wein.

Moonraker. It was the James Bond movie where 007 owed it all to Star Wars. This is the issue where Spider-Man owes it all to James Bond, as the lab from last issue is stormed by both a SWAT team and Hammerhead's previously forgotten henchmen.

In the tale's second half, we get more of the same as Hammerhead's men try to kill Spider-Man and Dr Octopus in the super-villain's secret lair. Throw in Hammerhead's somewhat ostentatious helicopter and you almost expect Sean Connery to turn up in his Aston Martin.

Amid all the chaos, there's just one question.

Just why do both sides insist on using, "anaesthetic bullets?" OK, at a stretch, you could just about credit a SWAT team with doing it, trying to avoid hurting innocent hostages, but Hammerhead's men? They're supposed to work for one of the most ruthless criminals this side of Los Angeles.

I admit it. I lied. There are in fact two questions, not one.

The second is Aunt May. How come she seems to have heart attacks at the drop of a hat but, whenever things are going on around her that'd give the average man in the street a cardiac arrest, it seems to do her no harm at all? She manages to get caught up in two armed sieges in this tale, get abducted, sees a ghost come back to life and gets directly threatened with physical violence and suffers no ill effects at all other than fainting.

For that matter, when he finally gets her free, Spider-Man doesn't seem at all concerned for her well-being He's clearly more intent on giving Dr Octopus the punch in the mouth he thinks he owes him than getting his aunt medical treatment, even though she's lying there, spark out. Perhaps he suspects what we must all suspect by now, that that "sweet old lady" is putting it on. Time to call in the lawyers, I reckon.

Lowlight of the tale has to be the return of Hammerhead's spinning office. It was a lame enough gimmick before without us having to endure its resurrection.

If the room's the lamest moment, compensation for it comes from Dr Octopus using a rubbish bin to bring down Hammerhead's helicopter. For that matter, the incident makes it a very strange issue indeed. It means we have a tale where Spider-Man's irrelevant in his own comic. The truth is, if Spider-Man was excised from this issue altogether, it'd make no difference at all to its settlement.

But, before we go, there's one more thing to be dealt with in this tale, because the revolving office isn't the only lame gimmick that returns, as the Spider-Mobile's revived by hands mysterious. Who is the man in the chair, working so hard on it? And who is his mysterious employer? You know, the large looking man? With the cigarette holder?

How could we ever hope to guess?

Amazing Spider-Man #158. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from July 1976.)

"Hammerhead Is Out!"

Words by Len Wein.

Pencils by Ross Andru.

Inks by Mike Esposito.

Lettering by John Costanza.

Colours by Glynis Wein.

Curiosity didn't kill the cat and falling from a great height didn't kill Spider-Man. Although, the method our hero uses to save himself at the start of this tale, whipping up a hang glider from webbing, is probably the least practical method of self-rescue he could've conceived. Still, it got him where he needed to be; in a rubbish skip.

But if Spider-Man's means of salvation is unlikely, it's an odd issue all round. Nothing much happens for the first half of it. Peter Parker goes home and repairs his costume. Peter Parker has a short chat with Glory Grant. Peter Parker has a short chat with Mary Jane Watson. Peter Parker has a short chat with Joe Robertson.

Then, suddenly, halfway through, it's all go go go, as he tracks down Dr Octopus and fights him again for no noticeable reason before it occurs to him that he should be helping Octopus to deal with Hammerhead.

And therein lie a myriad questions. It seems Hammerhead wanted Octopus to set up his ghost-busting machine.

Why?

Because he knew it'd restore him to, "life." Turns out that was Hammerhead's plan all along.

But why was it his plan? Hammerhead's no scientist. How did he know that's what was needed to sort him out? And why did he spend weeks pursuing Dr Octopus, as part of a scheme that might never reach fruition, instead of bringing in another scientist to do the deed for him straight away?

Ah, the vagaries of the criminal mind.

And the vagaries of Aunt May's mind. Even after seeing Dr Octopus tie up two security guards, she still thinks he's a sweet old man. You do wonder if she was doing some sort of drugs in those days because, whatever she was seeing, it sure wasn't what anyone else was.

Amazing Spider-Man #157. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from June 1976.)

"The Ghost That Haunted Octopus!"

Words by Len Wein.

Pencils by Ross Andru.

Inks by Mike Esposito.

Lettering by John Costanza.

Colours by Glynis Wein.

Just as in real life, people in comic books can change.

Admittedly, in the mighty world of Marvel Comics, they tend to change after being bombarded with radiation.

Dr Octopus is no exception. The difference being that, rather than changing into a big green monster, or a man with elastic limbs, Dr Octopus has changed into a drunken bum. That's nuclear accidents for you. Despite everything you might hope, they're rarely your friend.

Admittedly, the change in Octopus was wrought by the aftermath of the accident, rather than the accident itself but, aww, who cares? Nuclear accidents, I like to blame them for anything that goes wrong in Marvel's version of New York City.

But what about that atomic explosion? Wasn't Doc Ock blown to pieces the last time we saw him? He was but you can't keep a good villain down. He survived by climbing down a shaft and wrapping himself in his tentacles. Now he's back and determined to yet again become the fine, upstanding member of the community he's always been.

But more than just his lifestyle seems to have been rejigged. Dr Octopus's attitude has too. He's still a ruthless villain but now, his internal monologue suggests he really is taken with Aunt May, where, before, the implication's always been that he's been using her for his sinister ends. Maybe I'm a slushy romantic but I'm more than happy with this development. It makes Ock a more developed and complex character than the two dimensional one we've seen over the years. It's also good to see his embarrassment as he sits on the sofa with Peter Parker. Once, he would've warned Peter to, "Keep quiet if you know what's good for you." Now he merely squirms and politely asks him to pass the Kentucky Fried Chicken.

Sadly, no sooner has he told Parker how he survived the nuclear blast, than they have another visitor, as Hammerhead barges in.

Except Octopus isn't the only one who's changed. Hammerhead has too.

Now he's a ghost.

And he's out for revenge.

There's the obvious question here of just what Dr Octopus is frightened of. After all, Hammerhead's ghost seems to have no substance to it at all, meaning it's hard to see what harm it can do to either Octopus or Aunt May. Still this doesn't stop Octopus smashing out through the wall with Aunt May, nor stop Spider-Man from chasing him and trying to fight him. Quite why Spider-Man's so determined to fight Octopus when all Octopus is doing is trying to save his aunt from Hammerhead - the true aggressor in this tale - is something Spider-Man of course doesn't question. It's a Pavlovian response with him. He sees a super-villain, he has to hit him.

On other matters, we learn the Spider-Mobile's gone missing. You have to congratulate Len Wein on this development, as he must be the only person by this stage who actually even recalled its existence.

Liz Allen and Harry Osborn are starting to get friendly with each other, which is nice to see. They've both been under used in recent months, so it's pleasing to see them get some sort of storyline.

Not for the first time over the years, we get a cliffhanger ending that involves Spider-Man falling from a great height. As he managed to survive all his previous falls with ease, I have a feeling he won't be joining Hammerhead next issue in becoming a ghost.

Then again, I could be wrong. Will next month see the first ever adventure of Spider-Ghost?

Time will tell.

Amazing Spider-Man #131. Dr Octopus & Aunt May's wedding

(Cover from April 1974.)

"My Uncle... My Enemy?"

Words by Gerry Conway.

Pencils by Ross Andru.

Inks by Giacoia and Hunt.

Lettering by Artie Simek.

Colours by P Golderg.

Telly Savalas. He knew of what he spoke.

So, Spider-man flings itself as far into the realms of the unlikely as it could have done had Peter Parker discovered the entrance to Narnia in the back of his wardrobe. Maybe Gerry Conway was saving that storyline for later. It turns out that, unknown to her, Aunt May's inherited a Canadian island containing a nuclear reactor - as you do - so it's off to Canada for the lot of them.

Dr Octopus, meanwhile, seems somewhat confused. We're initially told he wants the island because it contains a nuclear reactor with which he can create weapons to terrorise the world but then, later, he's startled to discover the island contains a nuclear reactor. If he didn't know that, why was he so desperate to get the island in the first place? For that matter, Hammerhead clearly doesn't know the place contains a nuclear reactor either (or even seem to know what a nuclear reactor is!) so the pair of them seem to be battling over a barren lump of rock without either of them having any reason to think it's worth having.

For that matter, where are the plant's workforce? Since when is a potential atomic bomb left unattended?

On top of that. Only last issue it was established that Spidey can't drive. Now he's flying a jet.

And what's happening with Hammerhead? Here, he leaps, feet first, into the world of the lame. After last issue's partial rehabilitation, where he was happy to kill people - even his own flunkies - this issue his men are armed only with stun guns. Stun guns? This is supposed to be a ruthless killer.

Aunt May's stupidity hits new levels as, even as Doc Ock is calling his men dolts in front of her and threatening to have them done away with, she still doesn't seem to register that he might not be the nicest man in the world. Even Octopus producing a secret helicopter - and a secret island - from nowhere doesn't seem to make her seriously question him.

And since when can, "the slightest vibration," cause a nuclear reactor to explode? What idiot designed that thing?

The odd thing is that, despite the ludicrousness of it all, I actually don't mind this story that much. I mean, I could tear it apart all day long but it's a comic book and comic books are an odd sort of art form. Where novels, movies and TV shows can be destroyed by silliness, comic books are strangely immune to it. In fact, they often feed on it. Let's face it, Galactus and the Silver Surfer are pretty ridiculous but that never stopped their first appearance in the Fantastic Four from being a classic. In truth, my real gripe would be that this issue's pretty much action from start to finish, whereas, the appeal of Spider-Man has always lain most in its quieter moments.

This means that the true highlight for me is actually well away from the action.

Back in New York, at the tale's finale, Mary Jane and Betty Brant discuss MJ's relationship with Peter Parker. In a masterful piece of visual story-telling, Ross Andru uses light, shade and a few snowflakes to unveil a darker, more troubled side to MJ than we've ever seen before. I told you Telly Savalas was right. A picture really can paint a thousand words and, here, Ross Andru proves it.

Amazing Spider-Man #130. Hammerhead, the Jackal and Dr Octopus

(Cover from March 1974.)

"Betrayed!"

Words by Gerry Conway.

Pencils by Ross Andru.

Inks by Giacoia and Hunt.

Lettering by Artie Simek.

Colours by P Goldberg.

Spider-Mobile Spider-Mobile. What are we to make of you? So like the Batmobile in so many ways but, in so many ways, not.

Maybe there's something wrong with me but, reviled as it is, I actually like the Spider-Mobile. I mean, I wouldn't want Spidey to have spent the rest of his career driving around in it. It would've somewhat hampered the style of a man we're used to seeing swinging from skyscraper to skyscraper but I can't help feeling that people tend to miss the point of it. It's supposed to be naff. It's supposed to be a travesty. It's supposed to be an embarrassment. It's supposed to be the worst idea ever. And being lumbered with it is exactly the sort of thing that would happen to Spider-Man. It wouldn't happen to Superman. Can you imagine the Thor-Mobile? And it definitely wouldn't happen to the Hulk. But poor old Spidey, that's the way his cookie crumbles. It does also give us a chance to be reminded that our hero can't drive and doesn't care.

On the villain front, Hammerhead's back, the Jackal's back, Dr Octopus is back. We can hardly complain of being short changed this month. In truth, between them, they feature for a surprisingly small percentage of the tale. But that's fine. This issue is prologue to bigger things and it's not like we don't get much action in the meantime.

I'm a lot happier about the return of Ock than Hammerhead but anvil face is handled pretty well this tale. Possibly because we don't get to see a lot of him and also because his men suddenly have laser beams and jet packs and die if they try to say his name. It at least moves him away from the just-a-1930s-style-gangster portrayal we were given on his previous appearance and almost into a modern day Fu Manchu.

As for the tale's conclusion; it's completely ludicrous. It's just about believable that Aunt May might want to marry Doc Ock. She has, after all, singularly failed to spot him for what he is ever since she first encountered him. But would she really not tell her own nephew?

But you know what?

I love it.

Yes, it makes no sense but, to have a hero's closest living relative marry his deadliest enemy who then becomes his uncle is a twist so audacious, ridiculous and Spider-Manny that I just can't resist it.

Amazing Spider-Man #115. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from December 1972.)

"The Last Battle!"

Words by Gerry Conway.

Art by John Romita/Tony Mortellaro.

Lettering by Artie Simek.

Two facts emerge from this tale.

One. Aunt May has the intelligence of a cabbage. Even after all these encounters with Doc Ock, she still hasn't figured out he's a bad guy.

Two. Her heart's clearly coming on in leaps and bounds. A woman who traditionally collapses at the sight of a kitten, somehow manages to get through an armed siege on a house and two encounters with Spider-Man - during one of which she tries to shoot him - and her heart seems fine. You start to wonder if she's been putting it on all these years, just to get sympathy.

May Parker aside, you can't get away from it, this is one of the most action-packed issues of recent years - and all the better for it. After a couple of not very memorable months, the tale suddenly bursts into life, with out-and-out war between its two villains, and also starts to set things up for the future. At the very end of the story, Hammerhead even briefly manages to become an interesting character; and that takes some doing.

Highlight of the month has to be the "gentleman" act Dr Octopus puts on for Aunt May during his confrontation with Spidey. You get the feeling Conway was having fun with it.

On other fronts, Gwen's still calling Aunt May, "Mrs Parker." Sigh.

Amazing Spider-Man #114. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from November 1972.)

"Gang War, Shmang War! What I want To Know Is...Who The Heck Is Hammerhead?"

Words by Gerry Conway.
Art by John Romita/Jim Starlin/T Mortellaro.
Lettering by Artie Simek.

Hammerhead. What images that name conjures up. Right from the moment you first hear it, you know what a character called Hammerhead's going to be like; a deadly opponent of the Sub-Mariner. Sleek and deadly, armed with huge strength and cunning.

What's that? He's not? Turns out he's just some two-bit hood with a hard head?

You may have guessed I've never been a huge fan of Hammerhead. I mean, if Spider-Man - or anyone else - wants to beat him, all they have to do is make sure to hit him anywhere except the noggin.

Sadly, this never seems to occur to either Spidey or Doc Ock, two men of proven genius. The story itself''s OK but I don't think anyone's going to be putting it on their list of Spider-Man classics. I also have to say that Hammerhead's revolving office is plain ludicrous. Exactly what purpose it serves for the villain is anyone's guess.

Highlight of the tale has to be its climax, with Aunt May in league with Dr Octopus and clobbering Spider-Man - also introducing the concept that Spidey can't sense threats if they come from friends or loved ones. It's an idea Gerry Conway would use again in a far more significant tale than this but, right now, it's new, and if there's an ending you didn't see coming, it has to be this one.

On the art front, it's the second issue running that Jim Starlin gets an art assist credit - and the second issue running that I can't see even the vaguest hint of his involvement. I guess that, despite having once been bitten by a radioactive artist detector, my artist detector sense isn't all it could be.

Or perhaps I can only detect art assists from my enemies and not from my friends and loved ones...?

Amazing Spider-Man #113. Dr Octopus and Hammerhead

(Cover from October 1972.)

"They Call the Doctor, 'Octopus!'"

Words by Gerry Conway.

Art by John Romita, Jim Starlin, T Mortellaro.

Lettering by Artie Simek.

What an unbelievable Doctor Dr Bromwell is. Just by planting a stethoscope on Peter Parker's chest, and having been told none of his symptoms, he can tell instantly that he has a duodenal ulcer. No wonder Americans don't want a National Health Service if their system produces medics of this calibre.

But then, doctors have always been clever in Spider-Man. Look at Doc Ock. Not content with seeing off our hero - and removing his mask in the process - he then refuses to fall into the trap of his mysterious new rival for control of the local crime scene. But, in truth this isn't that much of a story. Spidey fights Octopus a couple of times, ultimately beats him with one punch and then Octopus's mystery rival's revealed.

Something that does leap out at me during this issue is a strange thing that happens only in the world of comic books, where people who're basically friends insist on calling each other by their surnames. It happens in The Fantastic Four all the time, where, for instance, Mr Fantastic and Ant Man will have a conversation, and Mr Fantastic will be calling Ant Man, "Pym," and Ant Man will be calling Mr Fantastic, "Richards." The very same thing happens in this tale with Peter and Ned calling each other by their surnames even though they've known each other for years. Why is this? As every writer seems to do it, it's clearly a convention of the comic book industry but I've never been able to work out why.

On the Gerry Conway front - not content with giving Spider-Man an ulcer - for some reason, he decides to lumber him with a comedy mask he can't breathe through. In my book, the replacement mask has to be one of the most annoying subplots the strip's ever had and it's a blessed relief for us all, not just Spider-Man, when the day finally arrives where the mask is disposed of.

Trouble is, that's not till issue #116 and we're only on issue #113. :(